This is the first in a series of Blog Entries about the Plight of Women and non-binary or trans colleagues in the criminal defence bar. Nothing expressed here represents the views of any organization or association where I have held a formal governance role, nor does it necessarily represent the views of my law firm or its staff. These are my own personal views and experiences only. I speak only for myself.

COMMUNICATIONS

I’ve been reflecting on an issue that is close to my heart. It is how women in the defence bar are treated. And the global impact this is having on our interactions with each other, the ways in which our communications are transforming. And, as it turns out, not in a good way.

The broader reflections led me to consider the gendered messaging to young women lawyers in the profession. We are told that equality has been achieved and that harping on poor treatment of women in our profession is not based in real concerns. I am not looking to buy an argument here and I am not looking to sway those who hold this, what I consider to be an out of touch, view of things. I am sharing my own experience and observations, in the hope that some of this may resonate with people who care to take the time to review it.

What I want to highlight are the implicit biases that many people aren’t really seeing. Including the authors of communications to or about women colleagues. Men don’t see it in their communications and some women miss it too, because we’ve been indoctrinated not to see it.

For the first time in my almost 30 years at the bar, I have come to fear that things may never change, despite enormous efforts by many women colleagues before me to improve the situation. And, to my sudden chagrin, despite my own efforts.

Women continue to leave the defence bar early on in their careers. Retention of women continues to be a huge problem. There are maybe a handful of us left of my vintage, slogging on through in the trenches. There are but a few who’ve not long ago become Crowns or sought appointment to the Bench. We are a tough and resilient, if small, group. Sensitivity training. cultural competence training, gender-equality or diversity training, etc., can only do and have only done so much. Not nearly enough.

What remains are some things, among many others, that I can’t seem to move the dial on, for love or money:

1. If the genders were reversed on interactions between men and women in some communications, reactions to the same exchanges would be 180 degree different. Women are very quickly perceived as rude, bitchy, inappropriate, dismissive, condescending etc where men are rarely, if ever, called out for actually patronizing, rude or offensive, and silencing speech.

2. As a result of this, we have grown a new generation of young women lawyers who communicate apologetically, with emojis, 18 exclamation marks, constant positivity and support, barely daring to make a pointed remark, for fear of offending anyone.

3. When men circulate news of their accomplishments, publications, articles, new jobs, etc, wherever, including on social media, nobody bats an eye. Not a critical eye. An admiring eye, a congratulatory eye, but not a critical one. And that’s as it should be. However: A woman lawyer celebrating her own successes causes a lot of back-lash and hushed whispers of massive egos out of control. Sometimes people go to the trouble of setting up entire social media accounts to make this one point. It’s a point that is sexist and unbelievably damaging. Ultimately, it compromises our ability to practise effectively, if we are afraid. If every word is scrutinized against a gendered standard.

4. What is a traditional expectation of ‘humility’ in the profession amounts to a false humility that older white men can afford, because nobody doubts their voice as the real voice of a real lawyer when they walk into a room. If you look and sound like what people imagine lawyers look and sound like, you don’t have to make much noise to be heard or seen. If you’re clawing your way into the profession, which had historically been dominated by white men, you sometimes have to make yourself seen and heard.

5. How constant admonishment against appearing confident about your own expertise or success translates for women, when we’re not allowed to be confident or proud of our own successes, experience and expertise gained, or when that expertise and experience is routinely challenged, discounted or dismissed, is profoundly destructive. It results in learned behaviour by women that is again endlessly apologetic. If you’re always told you take up too much space, you’re too loud, you’re too much, you quickly learn to preface anything you might have to say with a disclaimer. An explanation for why you feel you must say something, and sorry to disturb though.

6. I’ve worked closely with women defence lawyers over the last year and the experience has really opened my eyes to a lot of things. It involved watching young women seeking elected positions in all areas of law begin their platform statements by explaining how hard it is for them to seek those votes themselves and how uncomfortable they are having to list the reasons why they’re asking for those votes. I have watched women apologize for mentioning something they’ve done with a “I really hate to plug this thing that I did”, or some such, all of which is ridiculous. Men don’t apologize before mentioning something they’ve done that might help you to know about, like a book they wrote or a resource they built.

7. Also in the past year, many women lawyers came to me and asked me to promote their work or their participation in something. They invariably indicated they did not feel comfortable doing so themselves. I don’t mind doing that; indeed I’ve committed huge amounts of time to doing exactly that. During this past year I probably spent many dozens of hours promoting the work of the Women’s Committee for the Criminal Lawyers’ Association, and our various events. What troubles me is that women are afraid to “toot their own horn” as it were. They feel they have to ask someone else to say it, because they can’t possibly do it themselves. They shouldn’t be made to feel ashamed for saying “here is what I do, what I have done, what I want to do, what I’ll be doing.” But they are, we are shamed for it. Every day and every hour in every imaginable way, including subtle ways, largely probably often unintentional. That’s the problem. It’s ingrained. It’s implicit or what you might understand better as unconscious bias. And it’s rampant.

8. My time as Women’s Director reinforced my pre-existing impression that women behave very differently in their own “room” without men present. In this discussion, and throughout these points, I in no way discount the experiences of my non-binary and trans colleagues. I am using “men” and “women” as short-hand, and my apologies if anyone feels excluded. I hope that nobody does. I am including in my intent all who are affected by what I am pointing out. The CPDs we ran for Women, those who identify as female and our non-binary colleagues have had a particular feel to them throughout. We heard women voicing questions, fears, feelings, impressions, in what I perceived as authentic and transparent ways, using their own voice, without having to preface everything with the otherwise seemingly obligatory apology. It was a joy to behold, all of it. I was honoured and extremely fortunate to be part of this year-long experience.

9. My comments are not restricted to any particular type of communications or to the defence bar. But they do apply, in my own view, based on my own experience. I recognize that this experience may not be shared by everyone, not by all women, not by my trans or non-binary colleagues. I recognize that people have different views. I don’t suggest I am right and anyone who disagrees with me is wrong. I do suggest that I have lived and observed these things and am profoundly discouraged and disheartened by them. I have spent most of COVID, in a host of differing ways, trying to support and bolster my women colleagues, in strong numbers, to empower them to speak up for themselves and all of us.

10. I really had high hopes that I was able to contribute, in some small way, to making a difference. In the end, I am not sure that any positive change has resulted from the heroic efforts that so many before me, and now myself included, have devoted to improving the plight of women in the defence bar. What I learned most recently went well beyond communications issues and messaging. There are huge problems out there including workplace abuses, sexual and other harassment, online stalking and worse. At the heart of it all is the simple, if ugly, truth that women lawyers are disrespected day in and day out. The more we call out the discrimination and the abuses of authority, the more we are silenced, punished and bullied, dismissed or maligned. All of this contributes to a toxic work environment that women are, understandably, fleeing.

I will reserve comments on the balance of the issues for future posts.

UPDATE April 24 2023 – here is Taylor Swift and an article about her confidence & celebrating her own success that says pretty much the same thing I’ve said here in a more cheerful and uplifting way – thanks to a cherished colleague for sharing this with me and the 425 women whose community was the ultimate result of this Blog Series – follow up reading Parts II and III and you will see what I mean. Here is the article: https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/23/world/taylor-swift-ambition-essay-wellness/index.html